I felt really angry and discouraged after I put the pieces of the puzzle together. How could an industry that withholds comments praise my work and then deny me a contract over and over again?
Once again, I was the oddball.
It reminded me when I was trying to make it in dance and people said, “You’ve got talent, kid, but if you want to make it, you need to drop at least 30 lbs and get implants.”
Almost good enough, always almost good enough. But something is always missing.
The day after I got the rejection letter, I fell very ill and was ill for two weeks. All of my writer friends told me to put my manuscript away. The stress, anxiety and brooding only made me sicker until I just got sick to care.
And then my health returned and I cared again. A good friend used a quote of mine against me when I was whining about my frustrations. “Didn’t you say you find things when you stop looking for them?”
Damnit, I shouldn’t be so quoteable
Then the reality of my words hit me this evening. I was sitting at my desk tonight and the word, “Kodansha” formed in my mind out of nowhere. I was starting at the Tree of Life on my desktop, zoned out and trying to motivate myself to finish the astrological aspects for March (which by the way, are insane).
Kodansha is the comic book company that published Sailor Moon, where my dreams of being in the comic book industry began. And then it clicked.My next move is to pitch my MS as a script to comic book publishers. The comic industry is a lot more open minded than the lit industry. And although I’m a woman and it’s a boy’s world, I do have a female friend who is successful in the comic industry so it’s not impossible. Suddenly, everything felt right. It’s been a dream of mine since I was 12 to have a comic book series and now I see a way to make that dream a reality. I think I’m on to something and it’s really exciting. I think it may be the corner of the market where my story could find a home.
I talked to my friend in the business and it seems like I’m experienced enough with pitching to do this right.
I need to do some research but once I cruse the comic book store to find out what publishers may be interested in my work and I find out their guidelines, I don’t see why I shouldn’t go this route.